Is It Really Abuse? 10 Warning Signs You Might Be Missing
It can be sneaky. Sometimes, it’s so hard to realize what’s even happening. You find yourself wondering, "Is it really that bad?" or second-guessing if what you feel is real.
I’m not just talking about physical abuse. Emotional and narcissistic abuse often don't leave visible scars, making them difficult to pinpoint. One client told me, "He never laid a hand on me, but I feel like I'm disappearing inside of this relationship". That slow erosion of self-esteem is the reality for so many.
If you feel confused, please know your feelings are valid. To help bring some clarity, I want to walk you through 10 specific warning signs that you might be experiencing abuse in your relationship.
(For those who want to dive deeper, I’ve created a free, private quiz called Reality Check: Are you experiencing emotional or narcissistic abuse? It can help you identify patterns you might be missing and give you that "aha" moment you've been searching for. Find it here:
https://mycoachsusie1.outgrow.us/mycoachsusie1-3)
Here are 10 warning signs to look out for:
1. Walking on Eggshells Do you feel like you have to be incredibly careful around your partner?. This often looks like watching every single thing you say or do just to avoid setting off an argument or a bad mood. One woman I worked with even spent hours rehearsing how she would bring up a simple topic to avoid setting her partner off. That is a huge red flag.
2. Constant Criticism Does your partner belittle or criticize you, sometimes disguising it as a "joke" or "concern"?. These constant put-downs, like being told you're "too sensitive," slowly chip away at your self-confidence.
3. Isolation from Friends and Family Abusers often try to cut you off from your support system. You might notice that you don't see your friends or family as much as you used to. Your partner may get upset when you want to spend time with others or make you feel guilty for doing so.
4. Financial Control This is a powerful way to keep you trapped and limit your independence. It can look like your partner controlling all the money, preventing you from working, or monitoring your spending.
5. The Silent Treatment When something goes wrong, does your partner give you the cold shoulder for hours or even days?. This isn't just a need for space; it's a form of emotional punishment that leaves you feeling confused and desperate to fix things.
6. Gaslighting Gaslighting is a classic manipulation tactic where your partner denies things that actually happened to make you question your own memory and reality. You’ll hear the classic phrase, "That never happened".
7. Love Bombing Followed by Devaluation This is an emotional push-and-pull that keeps you off balance. One day your partner might shower you with intense affection and attention, and the next, they withdraw or criticize you.
8. Blame Shifting When something goes wrong, are you always the one who gets blamed?. An abuser will flip the script to make you feel responsible for their anger or actions, saying things like, "Well, if you hadn’t have done that, I wouldn’t have had to get so angry".
9. Monitoring Your Whereabouts This controlling behavior is a major red flag. It includes your partner checking in on you excessively or getting upset when you don't answer calls or texts immediately.
10. Feeling Like Nothing You Do Is Ever Enough Do you constantly feel like no matter how hard you try, your partner is never satisfied?. That persistent feeling of failure is emotionally exhausting.
If any of these signs resonated with you, I want you to know you're not crazy and you're not alone. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward clarity.
If this resonated, take the next step with me. ❤️ My Rise and Thrive Women membership is a private, off-social media community for healing and support. Get live coaching, workshops, and more.
Try it free for 7 days! Join here: https://www.skool.com/rise-thrive-women-8662/about?ref=6b0458e8645641b2973eb5e132c8eb7b
Which one of these signs stood out to you the most? Let me know by dropping a number in the comments. I read every single one.
Share this post